Conflict in my life as of now

At the moment I feel rather at peace with the outside world, but inside I'm battling. It's a daily struggle to be productive and simple do homework for example. Often times I find myself wondering why everything around me needs to be organized and why not simply let it go. Why do my laundry? Why make the bed? Why fold clothes? Why eat healthy? I've convinced myself that if I do not take care of my daily actions more pain will result than pleasure... Pain seems to be the catalyst of change, but if I know I function better being organized why is it so difficult to stay on top of things? Internally this conflict tears me apart. Conflict with the family is natural and it seems the older I get the more values I share with my parents and the conflict is beginning to fade away.

If a conflict is particularly violent it makes a strong impact on how I feel about the conflict. If for example I see a fist fight, I'll think why? Why has it come to such an extreme measure? It will extremely difficult to come to a mutual understanding afterwards because the solution was reached not because of understanding, but because of submission. I typically view this type of conflict as unhealthy and short lived unless held into check by violence. On the other hand if both sides present their issue with the other side, it seems that through knowledge a long term solution can be found where both parties are satisfied.

The conflicts that matter most are the ones that will directly effect our lives. Whether it be a conflict with a family member that will either create harmony or hatred. Conflict on the international level is particular important in an ever globalizing economy. If countries need to interact with each other it needs to be out of mutual consent and beneficial to each party.

I'd like to learn how to approach conflict in order to resolve it where both parties are satisfied. Learning how to enter a conflict where the problem can be confronted without feeling intimidated or defensive. I'd like to think of it as a conversation learning about the other side and not so much of how to impress my opinion on a problem or visa versa. I'd also like to learn how to deflect the anger of a problem and attack the trouble from a different angle instead of strait on where no ground can be lost.